The cost of not following your passion (part 2)

The cost of not following your passion part 2

What if you don’t know what you are passionate about?

Your inner self always, always, always knows and has clarity. But we are so disconnected from it, so used to prioritizing our mind -which, biased by all our subconscious beliefs, questions that intuitive voice -, that we often feel lost or convince ourselves of wanting something just because we picked it up from the external world.

There are cues in those things you genuinely crave to do and get lost in. Those things that you are waiting to do at the end of the day, once you have more time, x amount of money or when you retire. 

Don’t fool yourself thinking that making your passion a hobby is good enough. There are many things that bring us joy and we should do more of all of them -it elevates our life experience and that of the people around us. However, what we are truly curious and fascinated by is directly related to our purpose. So, have your hobbies and dive deep into your passions. How can you know if it is one or the other? Ask yourself, what would be the cost of never giving this an honest try? What would my 80-year-old self say/think/feel? 

Don’t kid yourself. You do know. The thing is you can’t see HOW that which is so fascinating, easy and that you are truly curious about, could be your way to bring value to this world. You don’t have to know the how. You just have to start giving it a try, in order to see to believe.

Giving it a try means: 1) putting more energy every single day into those things you are interested in and excited about, and /or 2) testing doing things in ways that feel more natural to you -your unique ways of spreading your gifts, are a gifts in themselves.

How do you identify your natural skills and ways?

Realize how that which is so easy and obvious to you, isn’t to many.  When you think: “that is so simple anyone could do it”, challenge that thought: is it really something anyone can do? Also observe when you judge why people don’t see or do the things in the ways that are so clear to you, and question yourself:  what if this is not their fault but my virtue?

Doing what naturally fascinates you and comes easy to you, doesn’t mean there won’t be challenges, or that practice and dedication won’t be needed. It means that by prioritizing giving energy to what you are naturally designed to excel at, the payoff and value created will be exponential compared to putting it into things you learned or were expected to do.

This is not about you. You are the instrument, the channel through which life experiences itself. What excites you might change in the course of your life, or you may want to go deeper and deeper into just one subject. There are no rules other than to follow your genuine curiosity.  So, do it! Do it with the intention to make the world a better place. This might be sharing your music, your acting, your designs, your analysis, your systems, your programs… We all want to matter, to be seen, to be recognized, and the best way to achieve that is by noticing what is true to us, accepting our unique Human Design and honoring it by taking aligned action.

By signaling you are willing to follow your passion, life will start presenting you with the right people, resources, information and situations you need. The path will be built step by step as it always does, and you’ll know you are walking your path and no one else’s.

How to deal with the inner critics?

We need to be aware of the usual negative voices in our head, to prevent them from ruling our actions. Like, “I hear you, but I won’t follow you”.  As Brené Brown says, these are three inner critics always present:

• Shame: who do I think I am to be doing this? I’m not good enough.
• Comparison: so many know more than I do, have more experience, more charisma, have studied so much more, are more…
• Scarcity: what am I doing that is original? so many other people are doing this.

So, notice when the critics are in the room, say “hello” and continue focusing your attention on the process. Not on the outcome, not on the possible failure or success. Just on the process.

The only thing you can know for sure is that there is no one better at being you than you. So, make sure you do your level best every single day to be more you. Bring value to the world by doing the things you are genuinely fascinated by, and do so enhancing your natural skills and ways. Whatever you do in this manner, will be unique.

Don’t jump off a cliff

If what you are doing now does not excite you and you have decided to change direction, you don’t need to jump off a cliff. Please don’t, unless you have prepared the scenario to do so. Otherwise, you are setting yourself up for failure. You’ll be sabotaging yourself and creating the exact situation to prove the belief that your joy can’t be the source of your success.

Being prepared includes things like setting up a financial cushion (i.e. savings to cover all living expenses for 3 – 6 months), taking a course, talking with people in the industry etc.  The financial cushion is key both when you know what the next thing is and when you don’t. If you have been laid off, without time to set up your fund, then find a provisional job to cover your main expenses but that leaves you the space and time for the next real thing.  The key here is to make sure we don’t engage in a fearful scarcity mindset that fogs our genuine desires and knowing.

From theory into action

Ask yourself these questions and let the answers come to you. Write them down. Start taking aligned action.

• Rate from 1-5 how you feel with each of the following areas of your life. (1= very far from how I want, 5 = exactly as I want).
  • Health and wellness
  • Relationships (family, friends, partner, colleagues…)
  • Finances, career and work
  • Peace of mind (fulfillment, calm, acceptance of the present moment)
  • Life enjoyment
• Why?
• How do I deeply desire to feel in each of these areas of my life?

Questions to design actions:

• Once I achieve “xyz” goal I’m pursuing, how do I expect to feel?
  • Is there a way I can start feeling that way right now?
• Once I achieve “xyz” goal I’m pursuing, what will I do more of?
  • Could I start doing more of that right now?
• Is it possible that by giving more attention (thus energy) to that which I’m passionate about, I could achieve that goal as well?
  • If the answer is NO:
    • Where did I learn that? Or who did I learn that from?
    • Is that absolutely true?
    • Can I think of any examples of people who have achieved similar goals, doing this?
  • If the answer is YES:
    • Why am I not doing more of that?
      • Whose voice is blocking me from doing this?
    • Do I worry how my external image may be affected? (i.e. if I follow what I’m really passionate about or if I do things in my natural ways, people won’t see me as “intelligent”, “respectful”, will think I’m lazy, soft, hippie, etc.)
      • Is it true that people will think that?
      • Who would think that? I’m I sure?
        • Why do I care?
      • If I succeed, what would I be showing them? And, how could that benefit their life as well?
    • If money was completely secured, what would I want to do?
    • If there were nobody or nothing to compare myself to, what would I truly like to do?
    • What would really matter to me if there were no external appreciation or critique?
    • What is the story I’m telling myself that is not allowing me to follow my what I’m passionate about?
    • How would that story change if I was told my life’s duty is to do what I’m genuinely fascinated by?

Now go back and make sure each answer is yours and not the voice of someone else or society. Change your answers accordingly.

Final questions to take action:

• What can I start adjusting in order to create a daily life experience more attuned to what I truly want? (Think of the next little step out of your comfort zone).
• When can I start making each of those adjustments? (This should not be more than a week after you’ve finished answering these questions).